If you are like me, and the rest of America, you have probably seen the video from Sweet Brown. I attached a link below to show you if you haven’t seen it. This video went viral and it’s actually been a lifesaver for me. My daughter is very dramatic, much like myself, and when she starts to whine I don’t always know what to do. I used to joke, “if she’s gonna whine, I’m gonna drink wine!” If you’re a mother of daughters, you know that whining is inevitable for these overly dramatic little human beings. You also know that it sounds like nails on a chalkboard and can drive you over the edge. It makes me want to find a closet to lock myself in me get away from it! Of course, as a mother, my job is to teach my children to deal with their emotions and talk things out in a healthy way. And let’s just say, whining is not healthy in my family because it causes me to lose my crap and turn from fun mommy into crazy psycho mommy (kidding, not kidding).
I have been trying to work with my daughter for months, I tried not responding to the whining, but ignoring it made her think, “mommy must be deaf, maybe I just need to whine louder so she can hear me. Or I should flail on the floor so she sees me better.” This approach didn’t work well for me.
Iv tried telling her to use her words and explain her feelings. This usually ends up with a whiny explanation of how she’s feeling.
I’ve tried the gentle parenting way of hugging her through it, but it felt like she started whining just for hugs and the whining actually increased.
What do I do?!
One day, I looked down at her after she whined all morning and, in the famous words of miss Sweet Brown, I said “ain’t nobody got time for that!” Then I began to sing the song and the kids and I started to laugh. It instantly stopped her and everybody began to join in with me. My kids love that video to so they knew the song. Before I knew it we were all dancing and singing, “ain’t nobody got time for that, nobody got time fo that!”
I guess not all parenting solutions can be found in fancy books and psychological advice or reasons why we should handle a situation a certain way. I think we take ourselves too seriously sometimes and try to give so many rules or character building lessons that we forget to dance.
Sometimes kids wake up in a funk, just like some days I wake up in a funk. And we all know the best way to get out of the funk is laughter. Maybe for you it isn’t Sweet Browns song, but I am sure you can find a way to get your kids to laugh in a tense moment and snap at them out of their funk. Try dancing, singing, tell their favorite joke, swing them around, use a funny accent, ANYTHING.
As a mom, I’m always looking for teachable moments and ways to guide them and to replace negative behaviors with positive behaviors. I probably lecture them too much sometimes or make situations more serious than they need to be. Sometimes, you just simply got a laugh and say, “ain’t nobody got time for that.”
Video from Sweet Brown: https://youtu.be/Nh7UgAprdpM